On monday of this week I began a rather intensive schedule (even more so than usual). I woke early to begin my day and saw my kids off to school. After getting work done at the church I returned home to see my 2 youngest boys before leaving for a class at the hospital and then I would stay for my on call shift until 8am. What this means is that I would not return the following day until they had already left for school. Moreover, I would be leaving the next day for a week-long class at seminary. Essentially this means I would see my little guys for about 15 minutes and then leave and not return until the end of the week (Friday).
As I took my things to my vehicle my 6-year-old came out to give me another hug bye and he said something I will not soon forget. “You are always leaving.” Am immediate rush of emotion came over me and I wish I could say it didn’t bother me, but it certainly did. I said yes, I know it seems that way and it wouldn’t be long until daddy’s schedule will be a little easier and I won’t have to leave as much. then he asked a question that dug deep. “Don’t you want to spend time with your family?”
At that question I could hardly keep the tears from flowing. I assured him that I certainly did want to spend time with my family and that I loved them more than anything. Of course the words resonated in my mind over and over and he just simply said “ok, see ya later”. How simple it was for him to just leave it at that. While I was so worried that he may not understand what was really happening and be upset at me, I realized that his faith and understanding was far more than I gave him credit for. He has a deeper understanding of life than I ever thought. I “gets it” even when I don’t. All he knows now is that daddy is very busy, but he won’t always be busy like this and will spend time with us.
I wouldn’t say it made things easier thinking of it in that way, it is nice to know that God has given my little guy a faith and understanding of the important things in life. unfortunately, life itself will quickly try to take that away from him. I pray every day that my children never lose their “child” faith.